Lacking any real super-hero power. But I can sit still for long periods of time and think.
Retain human size but with the strength of an ant!
An uncanny and sometimes supernatural desire to win which often results in injuries of varying degrees. This year, I will keep the desire while participating inevents that will probably not land me in a designed leg cast for the spring term.
Sarcasm and irony far beyond the powers of mortal beings.
On every third Thursday of months which begin on a full moon, I can pulvarize small objects by looking at them, blinking three times, counting to 10 backwards, and invoking the spirit of Elvis. Unfortunately, this technique only works on objects which contain staples, and have been microwaved for at least 2 minutes, so there aren't so many practical applications.
Ability to reliably underestimate workloads and actually over-estimate age requirements(even at some distance).
Uh. Just an ordinary guy (except I stay up as late as everyone here...)
magic left foot
Whenever crime threatens the City, I become Toaster Man. With 4 slots and a variable browning control, I am ready to take on any criminal scum that crosses my path. Black is a neat color too.
telepathy
able to wait patiently but hopefully for a true socialist revolution and just society
x-ray vision
The ability to stop time and live forever in an instant.
bionic impulse drive
I can hear the poems that things are telling, I can feel the heart of the universe beat.
none
Foo
Sleeping for long periods of time
the ability to vibrate your molecules at the correct rate such that you can move through solids
power of poopy
I have the ability to find a person's resonant frequency. Once I have found it, I'll hum that frequency and transform that person into a lifeless quivering piece of flesh. But I'll do that only in self-defense or in the face of evil...(Yeah right!)
projectile vomiting
I don't understand what you mean here.
I can instantly travel (via space-warp) between any two locations that have the same name (e.g. Rome, TX and Rome, Italy).
I can stare into the soul of mankind with amazing clarity.
The ability to instantly see the flaws of my opponent's theoretical justification of bad experimental results.
Intelligent
able to leap stacks of paper in a single bound
none
can leap small pebbles in a single bound